Clouds Over Los Angeles

Onward

Onward

Either up or down?  

Choice or fact?

Intended or not?

Or is it just my attitude?

Or intention?

Perhaps that could change …

Upward

Southern California sun warms arms,

Kissing us gently with the taste of a coming summer.

 

Each step is simple enough,

Taking care to stay on a path,

Well worn by earlier pilgrims.

In this life of mine.

Angst

It seems like it could not become more difficult and yet it does. The Covid-19 pandemic involved everyone in a sea of change. Economic, physical, illness, support, bravery, cowardice, bullying, privilege, gratitude, generosity, sacrifice. We have seen it all.

In a way the pandemic led to protect our physical safety, even though its effects have been psychological as well, with more than 1/3 of the population suffering from its affects with a modified mental state.

Then, comes the reminder of racial bias and unbelievable inhumanity with the death of George Floyd. The reaction of the population here is different. It is almost as if the pandemic has been forgotten for a moment. When our physical safety becomes slightly less important to us and our values about who we are and how we treat each other in society is front and center.

Who are we; these people who allow our tinted version of White Supremacy to continue in our society. Where poverty and the color of your skin still affects your chances of getting a fair shake in the land where the American Dream is still alive. Where anyone can be a winner. Where anyone can improve their lot. Where we are all equal. Where liberty, life and the pursuit of happiness are still king.

Let us reflect for a few moments on all those actions direct and indirect, by us and both others which contribute to an unfair and unjust playing field for many in our wonderful country.

And let us decide, individually how we can make the words of scripture come to life in our everyday world.

Galacians 3:28

There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.

Looking out into the familiar,

Crested waves confront my lower body,

As a few more steps are taken,

Until they reach my thighs,

Causing one final cold gasp to appear.

 

This, was further than before,

Which was more than the last time.

I can no longer see what is beneath,

Or trust this gentle slope will continue.

 

Glancing behind, the shoreline beckons control,

But turn I must and move out further,

Each movement now more tentative,

Searching for firm footings,

Until my breasts are under.

 

Here I stand once more,

No longer glancing back,

But thinking forward,

To commit fully to His Will.

 

And pass control to Him.

The Flower

It’s me here,

The Flower.

The one you have been waiting to bloom,

The one you have watered,

The one your sun shined upon,

Even when I didn’t deserve it.

It’s me here again,

Wondering if you are watching me,

Of course you are,

There I go again seeking attention,

Sorry …

 

Hi, I’m back again,

Asking those questions,

The ones about insecurity,

The ones about my heart,

Am I being true to you?

 

There, it’s out again,

The one worry I have,

As I act in the world,

With my gifts,

And my faults,

Am I with you always?

Please don’t think I am a child,

Even if I am.

 

For I know you love children,

I know you love me,

I know you love all.

And, even though I may be unsure sometimes,

Know that I love you.

With Loving Insecurity.

Your flowering daughter.