A prayer for times of distress

Lean in hard to God.

He will provide the support when you are exhausted.

He will help you when you are helpless.

He will love you when you have spilled yours to all around you.

Lean into His love.

Now.

Lean In.

Letting God In

Replacing that me today,

With a we; the we of togetherness,

The we of not being alone,

And yet, there is no one visible with me.

 

Releasing the God within me is not done by request,

It is achieved by release,

Not trying, but letting Go.

And suddenly,

I find the God who was there all the time.

Waiting patiently.

Every one is a time of sadness, in some way.

Immediate recollection of the moments spent together,

Rush towards you, from the eyes inward,

Until it sinks home.

They are leaving me.

 

There are small goodbyes, at the beginning of a day,

And larger ones, punctuating a reunion, meetings of hearts.

 

And the long goodbye.

Where they leave, and yet remain in your heart.

 

Eternally.

Behind the smile belies the intention.

Sitting there, quietly, but at the front the class,

Poised to make the snide remark to myself,

And then store it up for another day.

 

Each time my mask wears welcome,

For all to see.

The Pharisees would be pleased with my reserved judgement,

Visible only to me and my God,

Who I believe is looking at the mask and my visible deeds.

 

Meanwhile, the darkness of my soul envelopes me slowly,

Like an incoming fog.

Unremodelled

Just as it was,

As it will be,

Perhaps.

 

The snapshot shows what growing up was like,

How things were,

And I zoom back in,

As if preparing breakfast was happening again,

Before school.

 

But its not schooltime,

I am not a child, (anymore)

Externally.

 

But at times wish I was.

Clouds Over Los Angeles